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3:42 p.m. - 2005-02-02
broken

I broke another mirror. I must be generating some sort of anti-reflective field that results in the inevitable breakage of anything too shiny and smooth in my presence. (and on that note, I'm pleased the iBooks are such a lovely matte finish. Pity that they're white though.)
Not one to fuss over perfect reflections, I got my epoxy, some foam, and one of those funny things like qtips but longer for mixing glue, and went to work. If I ever get 'round to a gold membership, maybe I'll post pics of this, my latest post-modern mirror... Indeed, it isn't the only one in my house that's been broken and then ignored/repaired. The bathroom mirror seems safe, by virtue of being fairly permanently attached to the medicine cabinet door, but the seemingly similarly safe one on my bedroom door looks like it was rolled into a tube before being put up. Er. Which it more or less was. No real story there. It's some kind of odd plexi, and it was folded over into a tube, shattered in all the expected ways (and a few rather unexpected ones) and then attached to the door with industrial grade plastic adhesive. Or, as we like to call it, snot.
I think maybe I just don't ever want to get a good look at my face.

Crios.
If it hadn't been for C and the way he blew all my expectations into snowflakes and fairy dust and tiny sparkling shards, I think I'd really be happy with Crios. He's smart, creative, independant and far nicer than I deserve. He's kind and beautiful and a joy to be with, despite his dark demeanor and intimidating sense of dress. He doesn't look particularly approachable, but 5 years ago neither did I... and some days I still don't. He doesn't want to own me, control me, or tell me how to live my life, but I see the way he looks at me, and I feel that he would gladly give me his heart.
I wish I could be so sure.
I wish I could just love him.
I wish it could ever be that easy.

 

 

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